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Traditional Funeral Flowers – To Show Love and Remembrance

by Road Fun

To show love and respect towards our loved ones who have died, funeral flowers are the right offering. When the family is feeling low, these flowers bring beauty and comfort while reassuring them that life continues even after death.

Wreaths are the best of them all. The circular design on funeral wreaths signifies life and its continuity after death. The wreath, being a continuous circle that does not break, signifies that life in itself is a cyclical process and goes on for those who have been left behind. In times of grief, one may not wish to dwell on what the flowers mean but flowers do have a way of reaching out to the bereaved family. Wreaths are generally made of laurel or rosemary branches. Both the flowers signify remembrance and honour.

The casket arrangement is basically a large bunch that is especially created to be kept on top of the funeral casket.

Since space on the casket will be limited, if you truly wish to honour the life of the departed by presenting flowers you may want to check with the bereaved if they have already arranged for casket flowers. You can then choose flowers that can be used along pews, on entryway tables, or any other flat surface of the funeral home.

Funeral sprays are elegant beautiful displays that are placed on a tripod at the funeral home or grave site. Like any traditional arrangement of funeral flowers, sprays can be used in the church or funeral home as a way of conveying solace and comfort to the family of the deceased. Funeral sprays are generally designed with traditional flowers and can be customised to go with the preferences of the family or the person offering them.

Funeral baskets are more or less a gift sent to the family of the deceased, rather than as an offering of respect at the funeral.

While they are beautifully arranged, they contain things like chocolates, fruit, coffee or teas. Their main purpose is to cheer up people and make the atmosphere less mournful by symbolising the nice and fine things in life. They could also contain things that the deceased may have liked in their lifetime as a way of cherishing those memories that the departed may have shared with friends and family.

Funeral baskets can easily be bought from an online retailer and can even be customised or personalised as per the preferences of the family. Some also choose to order funeral gift baskets filled with personal health items such as teas, warm shawls and bath lotions to show that they wish comfort and good health. These baskets signify that the family is not alone in their loss and other people also think of and share their thoughts of the deceased as much as the family. Funeral baskets can also be delivered directly to the house of the deceased during the mourning period before the funeral service.

When tragedy strikes, close family members and friends collect to console, share and comfort. Gift and flower baskets are a way of showing your love, support and concern to the family members and honouring the life of the person who is no more.

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Estate Planning And Funerals – Advice From A Licensed Funeral Director

by dctim1

Estate planning can be a complicated endeavor if you try to do it alone. As a funeral director I’m often asked estate planning questions while making funeral plans with families. Due to the nature of our meeting the questions usually will center on “final estate planning” and what should they be doing to prepare? My response is always the same “seek the advice of a professional estate planning specialist.”

Regardless of a person’s phase of life, estate planning is something I believe should begin as early as possible. Having heard untold numbers of horror stories from families about losing inheritances due to poor estate planning, I’m convinced the earlier a person starts planning their estates, the better condition their “final estate” will be in.

Estate planning can encompass many areas of a person’s life. Planning for each phase of life can be a daunting task. Many things must be taken into consideration. It is very easy to become overwhelmed just thinking about it and why I believe many people just never get around to doing it formally. Hence, adding problems that many times will surface at the worst time, which is at or near the end of a person’s life. This of course only adds to the stress of loved ones who must then also deal with these estate issues.

Rules and regulations on issues related to estate planning change frequently in my observations. Particularly, those involving senior citizens such as Medicaid and asset allocations. Taxes and inheritance issues involving a person’s estate can be complex also.

For this reason, I would advise anyone considering a proactive approach to planning their estate, to discuss these issues with your attorney or CPA first. They should be able to help with these important issues or refer you to the appropriate people who specialize in these areas. If you don’t have an attorney or accountant to ask, call your state bar association for a referral. They should be able to provide you with names and addresses of attorneys in your area who specialize in estate planning matters.

Remember to incorporate some form of funeral pre-planning in your “final estate” plans. Many people go to great lengths to have their estates planned out, only to neglect to prepare for the most final of plans, their own funeral. Of all planning done, this will be among the most important and remembered by your family and loved ones.

When planning a funeral, www.funeralresources.com says that more than 75% of families need help with funeral estate planning, financial planning, and tax planning, Three of the biggest reasons most families need professional help are: 1. The lack of a proper Estate Plan. Sadly, greater than 70% of all people who die have never even created a Will, also known as a Last Will and Testament.. 2. These matters are often extremely difficult to work through shortly after suffering from such an emotional loss. 3. Lack of a funeral preplan, end-of-life plan, Family Record Guide, and/or funeral insurance By far, the most common questions, concerns and challenges are related to Funeral Estate Planning matters. Some of the Funeral Estate Planning challenges include the lack of a Will or Living Trust, difficulty locating a copy of the original Will or Trust, calculating and properly filing income tax and estate taxes, dealing with probate, difficulty located many important financial documents, collecting life insurance proceeds, family disagreements, and much more. At www.funeralresources.com, you can find a National Directory of Pre-Screened Funeral AND Financial Professionals. There are five fifferent types of Financial Professionals, including Retirement and Financial Advisors, Estate Attorneys, CPAs, Insurance Specialists, and Health Insurance Agents. By having these professionals in the same National Directory, this serves as a major benefit to many families because these Funeral …
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Tips For Writing A Eulogy

Both writing and delivering a eulogy are emotional, but at the same time a step towards healing. It’s never easy to put into words what someone’s life meant to you and to summarize their life in just a few minutes. By following the seven steps below you’ll be on your way to creating a memorable and heart felt eulogy.

Step One: Gather information. Jot down as many personal notes about the deceased as possible. Look at photos. Flipping through photo albums may remind you of important qualities and memories of the person who died. Answer a few questions: What made your loved one truly happy? What inspired you to write this eulogy? What were your loved one’s passions? What will you remember most about this person? Keep in mind that a eulogy is not a biography but more your personal thoughts and remembrances from your point of view. You may want to ask co-workers, friends and others for their stories and memories.

You should see some repetition in your notes and this will lead to the main theme.

Step Two: Begin to organize your content. Outline the eulogy in these steps:
I. A beginning to establish your theme.
II. A middle section to build on your theme with personal stories, information, quotes, comments, sayings, poems and other content. This information should make up 90% of the eulogy.
III. A short conclusion to summarize your thoughts and restate your theme.

Step Three: Work first on the middle section (Part II). Once you have this part the beginning and summary will be easy. Develop the outline by grouping similar themes from your notes from Step 1. For example, you might want to gather all the achievements together. Merge the comments about the deceased’s philosophy of life.

Step Four: Organize the conclusion (Part III). A conclusion reminds the listeners of the theme and imprints the strong feeling you have about the loss. The key is to conclude effectively and quickly. Here is an example:
“We will all miss Jackie’s sense of humor, her talent for knowing what is really important in life and her famous chocolate chip cookies” (a little humor doesn’t hurt as long as it’s not offensive to anyone).
“Her example lives as an inspiration for all of us to follow.”

Step Five: Write the beginning of the eulogy (Part 1). This usually starts with an attention getter. It will set the theme and can be in the form of a short story, a poem, a saying, lyrics to a song. It will introduce the goal and theme you used when you began the process.

Step Six: Polish it up. Your best bet is to walk away from it for a few hours or overnight if possible. Work on it so it sounds like a conversation. You want to talk to the audience as naturally as possible.

Key tips: Keep it short, 4-8 minutes long, 3-7 typed pages.
Type it out using 14 pt type so it’s easy to read.
Vary sentence length.
Number the pages.
Practice the eulogy aloud and time yourself.
Read it to friends and family and get their feedback. Edit where necessary.
Keep the content in good taste and keep it positive.

Step Seven: Delivering the eulogy.
While normally speakers do not read word-for-word, because you are more than likely going to be emotional, don’t be afraid to read word for word. This way you won’t leave out any key points you or others wanted said.
If making eye contact with members of the audience will make you emotional, either try and keep your eyes on the page or look just over the top of the audience to the back of the room.
Feel free to pause, take a deep breath and drink some water. Everyone will understand. They are emotionally distraught also.
Speak as naturally as you can just as if you were telling someone about your loved one. Speak up. It’s very important that you speak clearly and loudly so that everyone can hear you.
Keep the written eulogy as a memento. You can add it to your memento chest and share it with others who may want a copy.

Writing a Caring Eulogy

by kokeshi

Losing a family member or close friend can be devastating and can have a lasting effect on all who knew the person who has passed. Dealing with the loss of a loved one can be difficult and may require talking about your feelings, expressing your condolences to a family member or writing about your grief in a diary or blog. Funeral or memorial services are also a means to share in the pain and express love for the deceased in order to heal.
One reason for the elaborate ceremonies around death is to help with that loss. Funeral rituals are designed to help ease the transition. In many cultures and religious traditions, part of these rituals is the delivery of a eulogy – a short memorial message celebrating the person’s accomplishments and important moments.
If you have been asked to deliver a eulogy, appreciate the honor you have been given. You may feel that you are too sad or that you don’t have the skills to write and deliver an appropriately moving tribute at a funeral or memorial service. If giving the eulogy is overwhelming to you, remember that while it may seem daunting, there are tips that can help you manage your anxiety and help you provide a service to both the living in their moment of loss and to the one you have lost.
If you are asked to deliver a eulogy for someone you know, take a moment to sort out your feelings about the deceased and gather your thoughts. A eulogy is designed to memorialize and celebrate the good things in the person’s life. Pulling together a selection of memories and comments about those things can be a remarkable way to begin to deal with your own grief. Also, ask other family members and friends to share their memories, anecdotes and stories of how that person touched their lives. Hearing and sharing these memories can help you create a more complete picture of the person for those who are hearing you.
Once you’ve gathered your information, decide how you will organize it. Eulogies can take a chronological approach, where the eulogist traces the person’s life in the order in which it happened. They can also be given as a story of a variety of portraits of important moments – snapshots of tender times, gently humorous anecdotes, and the like. If more than one person is delivering a eulogy, coordinate with them so both approaches are used.
If you find it hard to think of moving things to say, you may want to look at various sources for inspiration or short quotes to include in your speech. From the Bible or other religious texts to anthologies and websites of eulogy poetry and inspirational quotes, you may find the words you seek. Be careful, however, your own words are more important than anything you can find elsewhere. Keep the tone of the eulogy personal and use simple language so that the listeners can connect more directly to your words and the memories it conveys of the deceased. Typically, a eulogy runs around five to ten minutes in length.
Giving a eulogy is an honor. It is a chance to help others begin the transition to a life after the person’s passing. The eulogist has a chance to ease the pain of others by providing them with a picture of the best things about that person, something they can hold on to in the difficult days to follow. To be asked to deliver a memorial tribute is to be given the responsibility of assisting many. A little time and preparation in the writing stage can make a huge difference in the impact of your delivery and can help you and your friends and family in their time of need.
~ Ben Anton, 2007

Flowers, A Language of their Own

by Veaconee

Copyright (c) 2010 Nadine Davis

Gorgeous, vivid, passionate and loving. Flowers say it all. Flowers have a language all of their own, red and white roses for love and passion. White lilies stand for purity, red tulip were a declaration of love in the Victorian era, orange lilies are for desire and passion, just to name a few of the more popular flowers, which are often used in bouquets of florists. A good suggestion for a floral arrangement for a funeral would include marigold, poppy and black poppy, which in the Victorian era represented love, grief, eternal sleep, death and farewell. Laurestine represents a token, when put with Aboruitae, Bellflower and Yellow Rose, it can represent a token of eternal friendship. It can also let a friend know that you are thinking of them.

Flowers are a perfect way to express your feelings and show your loved ones that you are thinking of them. It’s easy to forget those special days with the pressures of everyday living. Online flowers is an easy way to order flowers and have them sent for any occasion. There are many arrangements that you can choose from, in all different sizes and colours and many different flowers to choose from.

The Strathclyde University says that nature provides a simple way to improve our emotional health. I am sure we have all felt the joy that a bunch of flowers has evoked in us. Flowers can be given in everyday life in order to improve moods and emotions and keep the recipient happy and balanced. It doesn’t always need to be a special occasion. By using different flowers from your florist, you can express your emotions to the person you are sending them to. It is a good way to show the ones you love that you are not too busy to remember them.

Birthdays, Wedding Anniversaries, Valentine’s Day, or even just a way to express your emotions to the ones that you love. Flowers are a perfect way to show someone that you care. Not only are they beautiful but they also have a language all of their own. They also have a scent that improves the mood out of sight. It is quick and easy to order flowers online or for those who enjoy a more personal approach there are plenty of Florist shops where you can choose the style of the arrangement, as well as various vases and gifts that can be included with your choice of flowers. They cater for weddings, funerals, corporate arrangements, gift baskets, newborn babies, wreaths and casket sprays.

Writing a Eulogy for My Dad ? Compassionate Advice to Help Express Your Thoughts

“I’m writing a eulogy for my dad.” Those words are always spoken with sadness. It’s such a challenging time emotionally after the death of your father. You instantly miss him and once the decision has been made regarding who will deliver his eulogy, and it’s you, there’s a lot on your shoulders. Trying to come up with just the right words to capture the essence of someone so instrumental in your life is never easy. Preparing it and delivering it while being compassionate and composed is even harder.

It’s always good to begin with an outline when you’re preparing a eulogy for a parent. You want to include the right balance of their role as a parent as well as all the other hats they wore throughout their life. Although he was your father, he was also a brother, spouse, co-worker and friend.

Talk to others who were close to him. Gather their thoughts and stories. It’s wise to bring along a note pad so you can jot down pointers for helping you prepare your speech at a later date. Pay close attention to how people speak of him, the tone of their voice and the fondness. You’ll want to mention that in your eulogy as it’s not just about the tangible stories but also how deeply he touched other people’s lives.

One quality of a memorable and stirring eulogy is to always focus on the individual’s personality and characteristics that defined them. Perhaps your father was known for a certain saying or he was passionate about a particular hobby. Include sentiments regarding that in the eulogy for your dad. It’s a nice touch to include some of the short stories that others have shared with you. It makes everyone in the room feel as though they’re an important part of the remembrance and grieving processes. Don’t shy away from comical memories. It’s okay to smile and laugh when you’re thinking of him.

Don’t be afraid of being a bit unconventional when delivering your speech honoring your late father. Playing his favorite song or showing a brief movie clip that he’s in are both completely acceptable ways of showcasing the man he was.

Above and beyond anything else, celebrate his life more than you mourn his death. The eulogy you’ll be delivering will serve as a lasting reminder to everyone in attendance what a remarkable and cherished man your father was and how fortunate you all were to know and love him.

Burial options and funeral planning tips

by bill barber

When most people think of a funeral they imagine the traditional service.  Family night with the possibility of viewing the deceased, funeral home or church service followed by a committal ceremony at the cemetery.  Well, “the times they are a changing’ ” with many options available for your unique “farewell party”.  It is not unusual to attend a funeral or memorial service crafted around a theme including special music and poetry in a fitting location.

In the last twenty years the death-care industry has seen an increase in cremation primarily due to a lower price tag and a general acceptance of the practice.  This has resulted in the creation of creative options for human ashes, known as “cremains” in the industry.  It is possible to have a “jewel” formed from the carbon content in the cremains or artwork on canvas made of ashes and fixative.  Instead of parking an urn on a mantlepiece consider a granite bench or boulder with drilled holes to accommodate two, four even six family members. It is also possible to have your cremains take a ride in space!

Donate your body to science!  This is a popular choice for thrift-minded individuals.  There are ”body farms” where forensic scientists study the effects of decomposition under varying conditions.  You can be a part of solving a crime or murder.  Some donated remains are used for medical research.  Imagine becoming an integral contributor to science.

Other options for cremation include placement in an artificial reef in the ocean, sea and air scattering services and ground burial in a cemetery or mausoleum niche.  Most cemeteries will allow two burials in one plot-two cremations or one cremation with one traditional coffin burial.  Check with your cemetery for rules, regulations, policies and even financing options!

If cremation does not appeal to you another choice is a green burial.  The remains are buried in a biodegradable container such as wood, cloth or cardboard.  No chemicals are used in the preparation of the body.  The location of green cemeteries can be found online.

Generally it is a good idea to designate a final resting place to provided closure for loved ones.  Some people think they will be honored in an urn sitting on a mantlepiece but the reality is most urns end up tucked in a closet.  And that is fine for some but just keep in mind a future generation may not feel compelled to respect an ancestor with which they had no contact.

In closing, the most important aspect of planning is documentation.  A wonderful planning tool is available online- “Memorial Preferences” www.funeralplanworkbook.com  This 17-page how-to workbook is essential for planning your own funeral or memorial service.  Loaded with checklists and creative tips it guides you through the process of organizing all your vital paperwork.  There are places to record your final arrangements, medical history, location of important documents such as insurance policies and your will.  Record military service, family history, financial information and more.  There is also an outline to write your own obituary.  The workbook will be appreciated by your survivors as they will have the peace of mind knowing they are honoring your wishes and special requests.

When Death Occurs

Legal next of kin or durable power of attorney

Funeral Planning Checklist

There are more than 80 tasks to be done when a loved one passes away. By completing your Funeral Planning Checklist, you will have relieved and minimized the burdens left to your loved ones. When faced with multiple emotional and financial decisions, which must be made quickly and during a time of intense grief and stress, your Funeral Planning Checklist will assist your loved ones in being well prepared and well informed.

Purchasing a funeral should be handled the same way you would purchase any other “big ticket” item. The cost of a funeral is one of the largest purchases you and/or your loved ones will make. However, when a death occurs, there is little time available to research your options. Multiple emotional and financial decisions must be made immediately under great emotional stress.

Planning a funeral, especially if this is the first time you have been required to do so, is a very intimidating process. When we purchase any other “big ticket” items in our lives, we educate ourselves by doing research to make sure we are getting the best value for our money. When we don’t do our research ahead of time and make an instant, emotional decision, we usually end up regretting it in the end. How many times have you made an “emotional purchase”, only to find out later, it was less expensive somewhere else, the item did not meet your expectations or you didn’t really need the item? When purchasing a funeral, emotions should not factor in to the financial decisions. However, if you are unprepared, you will pay too much and purchase items that are not necessary.

I have heard many people say “my family knows what I want” or “I have already told my family what I want done”. In my experience, if your wishes are not in writing, your verbal instructions may not be understood, interpreted or remembered the same way with each person you have told. The result of verbal instructions, especially with multiple loved ones in a very stressful situation trying to assist, is similar to having multiple witnesses to the same auto accident. Each person sees, hears, recalls and interprets the information differently. This lack of specific instruction results in an unfortunate and unnecessary amount of family discourse and misunderstandings.

This guideline for your loved ones will help eliminate the stress and tension of decision making especially if each member of your Support Group is aware of and has reviewed your Pre-Planning Guide. I meet with client after client that share their stories of how the family fought and argued with each other over what mom told who and how dad said to do it.

I know a family that has not spoken to each other since their mom’s funeral, over seven years ago! It must be something major you say? No, they simply did not agree on the color of dress their mother had told them she wanted to wear. Does this seem a bit absurd to you? Unfortunately, it is a very familiar situation for me. Combine family, personalities, opinions, stress and emotions and you have the secret recipe for funeral mayhem! With your detailed Pre-Planning Guide, decisions are made, Support Group is chosen and everyone will literally be on the same page and have the same goals in mind.

Difference Between a Funeral and Memorial Services

Making funeral arrangements for a perished loved ones, or pre-planning your own funeral or memorial service can be a confusing and overwhelming task.  When making funeral arrangements, one of the first questions you should ask yourself is what type of service is preferred.  Though the terms funeral and memorial service are sometimes used interchangeably, there are some significant differences between the two services. Funeral Service is a service which held to memorialize a deceased person with their body present. A Memorial Service is a service which held to memorialize a deceased person with their body not present.

Funeral Services:
Funeral refers to the ceremonies held prior to the burial of the deceased. The time frame for a funeral is one of the most significant differentiate between a funeral and memorial service. Usually a funeral is held close to the time of the passing of the deceased. Typically funerals are associated with religious or cultural traditions, and can be held within the religious centers themselves, or funeral home or graveside.

Many funeral services include a multi-day gathering time, that process is commonly termed as viewing.  Not all viewings include an open casket.  Some families choose to make the viewing a closed casket event, with individual family members reserving the right to see the deceased privately for final goodbyes. Though this is not always the case, most often funerals are associated with traditional burial services rather than cremation. For this reason, many funerals conclude with a funeral procession to the actual burial site where a final ceremony may be held.

Funeral arrangements for traditional funeral services usually encompasses plans for where the body is to be buried, selection of a funeral home to help with the arrangements, selection of music, eulogists, scripture readings, and selection of a religious officiant.

Memorial Service:
The memorial service has become increasingly popular as families and friends are more dispersed from one another than in previous generations.  Memorial services can occur at anytime after the death of a loved one, and often take place in cities other than where the deceased may have lived or been interred. Memorial services are considered by some to be more secular, or non-religious services, though religious foundations to the service are not unusual.  Memorial services typically are less formal than traditional funeral services and also tend to have a “celebration of life” atmosphere.

Most families adopt a memorial service when cremation is involved.  For this reason many people associate burial with funerals and cremation with memorial services.  However, it has also become more common for families to hold a burial service with a later memorial service to accommodate distant family and friends who may not be able to make travel and work plans quickly enough to participate in the funeral services.

Memorial service planning is not limited to a funeral home setting.  Many families choose to gather at a location of some significance to the deceased, for example a natural setting on a beach or at the home of a family member. Because there are usually fewer costs involved, memorial services also tend to be less expensive options than traditional funerals.  Memorial services can be simply a gathering of family and friends who come together to celebrate the life of the departed.

Making funeral arrangements for a loved one’s demise is an important part of the grieving process.  When choosing between a funeral or memorial service, take time to consider the kind of goodbye ceremony that would have meant the most to the deceased, as well as taking into account the various travel plans necessary for family and friends.

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