Feed: Schm3cky Reviews Movies - AggScore: 45.5
Summary: Schm3cky Reviews Movies
I tell you what I think of a movie. WARNING! PROBABLY CONTAINS SPOILERS (I can't be trusted.) Plus I make stuff up.
This is a pretty good
vampire movie.
Wait is this a cowboy
movie?
Two guys facing off on top of
a speeding train?
Never seen that
before.
Hmmm, if you replaced the
motorcycles with horses it would be a freakin' cowboy
movie.
Lame!
It seems like they keep
making half a good movie these days.
I think maybe they run out of
time or lose a writer and things go all bad.
I did like the vampires with
no eyes.
I give it an ICBM (I Can't
Believe this Movie.)
A better vampire movie
A better cowboy movie
~schm3cky~
Date Published: May 19, 2011 - 9:09 am
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| She likes the book |
I can finally say that I have
seen this movie.
Where do I start? How about,
4 Hours!?
Four freakin' hours! It
ain't fittin'!
|
|
First Women
Who |
That's what she said. And by "She" I mean Mammy.
(Hattie McDaniel who won an Oscar for her role)
I had to watch it in two
sittings. Editing anyone? I could cut this down to an hour
easily.
I now better understand a few Bugs Bunny episodes.
I now better understand a few Bugs Bunny episodes.
This movie came out in 1940
so I guess it's hard to judge on today's standards but I did
not care for it. I'm pretty sure it's a chick flick.
Although Scarlett does bust a
cap in a Yankee's ass.
(Actually in his
face)
Then she and her friend hide
the body.
So that does kinda' make her kick-ass.
I give it an IDDY. (I Doubledog Dare You)
So that does kinda' make her kick-ass.
I give it an IDDY. (I Doubledog Dare You)
~schm3cky~
Date Published: Apr 26, 2011 - 1:31 pm
|
| OMG! Look at that thing! |
"The Tingler" is one of those
Vincent Price movies where you have to suspend
your disbelief real hard and just enjoy it.
It's also one of those movie
that's real fun to make fun of.
When it first came out it was
shocking for its use of color for a brief scene in which a
woman in a bathroom turns on the faucet and out comes bright red
BLOOD!
And then she turns to find
the bathtub full off BLOOD!
And rising out of the BLOOD
filled tub is an arm covered in BLOOD!
AAAAAAAAHHH!
|
|
It's RED! I give this movie an MR. (Man that's Red) |
~schm3cky~
Date Published: Apr 25, 2011 - 8:09 am
|
| Trailer |
A movie about candy?
Nooo.
It's The Matrix.
I recall seeing this movie on
TV when I was a kid.
All I remember is a scene
where an airplane starts falling from the sky.
What I didn't remember was
Tom Poston as the first Neo.
|
| Bullet Time at :37 |
Unless you and a clever
friend or two are crackin' wise all through this movie, it is
unwatchable as an adult.
I give it a
MST3K.
You know what I
mean.
~schm3cky~
Date Published: Apr 14, 2011 - 9:55 am
|
| thefilmstage |
One
word,
Winklevoss!
These guys must have had complete control over this movie. They come across looking like Angels.
And the actors that played them? Let's check, ok it was
Armand Hammer and Armie Hammer
who played the the twins.
What? That's one guy?
Wow, great special effects.
Actually, there was another actor who played one Winklevoss,
Josh Pence ,
and then they put Armie's face over his.
I liked this movie a lot more than I thought I would but now I don't trust programmers.
I give it a BTF. (Better Than Farmville)
Winklevoss!
These guys must have had complete control over this movie. They come across looking like Angels.
And the actors that played them? Let's check, ok it was
Armand Hammer and Armie Hammer
who played the the twins.
What? That's one guy?
Wow, great special effects.
Actually, there was another actor who played one Winklevoss,
Josh Pence ,
and then they put Armie's face over his.
I liked this movie a lot more than I thought I would but now I don't trust programmers.
I give it a BTF. (Better Than Farmville)
~schm3cky~
Date Published: Apr 08, 2011 - 10:28 am
Did not watch
it.
I put the DVD in and got
ready to watch with my girlfriend.
The music that played over
and over gave me brain rot and I had to stop.
Spent the evening with
Conan on the DVR.
I give Babies a G6.
(Ga ga goo goo ga ga)
~schm3cky~
Date Published: Apr 07, 2011 - 7:22 pm
|
| Posters |
(So awful it's awesome)
And just keeps getting more so.
How can you go wrong with, Tiffany, Debbie Gibson, Giant Pythons, Giant Alligators and Tiffany's Cleavage.
Add a little A. Martinez and you have a great big bowl of
SyFy Foo Fun.
You just know from the beginning there is gonna' be a cat fight and the movie does not disappoint. You get to see London and France (Wink) as they grapple with each other and some food.
Tiffany's cleavage really should have gotten a screen credit as the lead character.
I give it an LMR. (Let Me Rewind)
~schm3cky~
Date Published: Apr 04, 2011 - 11:38 am
This is just about the
funniest obviously made to be a video game movies
ever.
It has parts that are
indistinguishable from a one.
Ian
Mcshane plays the race coach and at one point refers to,
"The Tombstone," a detachable metal plate in the back of the
car. Wait, he was in, "Deadwood," not,
"Tombstone."
I was gonna' link to the game
but all the sites have too much popup and slamming. I won't
subject you to that.
Date Published: Mar 24, 2011 - 2:50 pm
A Twofer
Les visiteurs and Just Visiting
^ IMDb links ^
These is one of those,
"It was a great French movie so let's make a Hollywood version,"
types of movie. Movies.
But with a twist.
Both movies star the same two actors.
The Professional and this guy.
This is also one of those time travel movies.
If you could take the best parts of each and combine them into one movie it would be real good.
They are both pretty funny on their own but you have to read the French one.
In each movie they mention the title of the other one.
I give them an LG (Le Good).
~schm3cky~
Date Published: Mar 07, 2011 - 1:08 pm
|
| movie-wallpaper |
That
happens.
This
happens.
One a' these.
If you want to see the world destroyed this is your movie.
If you want to have fun and rip on a movie while you watch it, this is
The
Best.
Example: Hi all you
poor people whom we were going to leave behind to die but we just
changed our minds and let you on the rescue ships, We cool now,
right?If you want to see a bunch of smart people figure out how to save the world, not so much.
I give it a WW3D (Why Wasn't this in 3D)?
It was? Oh.
That would have been cool.
~schm3cky~
Date Published: Mar 07, 2011 - 10:56 am
Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi
IMDb link
Episode VI?
Isn't this the third movie?
I'm pretty sure there was only two before this.
WTF?
Is that a muppet? Sounds like,
Miss Piggy?
It is Miss Piggy! I think Luke went over to the Fraggle side.
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||||
| Into a backpack get turned hope I do not. |
|
| D'oh! I sure did! |
I think I'd rather watch something, something, something else.
I can watch this again and again.
I really like
H. Jon Benjamin the voice of Yoda. He just sounds funny.
|
|
| I am not Yoda... OK I'm Yoda. (onemetal.com) |
|
I give it a, wait what am I reviewing?
~schm3cky~
Date Published: Feb 17, 2011 - 9:18 pm
Watchmen
|
| Makes Sense When You See the Movie |
I liked this movie better
than the book.
Because I haven't read the
book.
The opening credits are the
best I have seen. Behind the words you get a history of the
heroes. I especially liked the Woman (Silhoette) grabbing a
nurse and kissing her on VJ Day. They go on to have a
relationship but unfortunately are killed off seconds
later. :(
This is a super hero movie
for grown-ups. No silliness.
At 162 minutes I think they
could have trimmed a little more but I was not
bored.
And not your usual happy
ending.
I give it a WW3 (Where Went
3hrs?).
~schm3cky~
Date Published: Feb 15, 2011 - 10:24 am
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