Feed: The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs - AggScore: 78.6

One last thing: R.I.P., Steve Jobs

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Rest in peace, Steve Jobs. O shaman, O wizard, O golden son of Zeus and mortal woman, you defied the gods, stole fire & gave it to mankind. For this they struck you down. Bastards! “One more thing.” That was catch phrase. Or was it the one about putting a dent in the universe? I [...] Related posts:

1. “Mr. iFart” appeals to Steve Jobs
2. Steve Jobs:Dragonslayer
3. Steve Jobs: Insanely great

I’m totally fine, but goodbye for now

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No doubt you’ve seen the news. For obvious reasons I won’t be blogging here anymore, though I will leave the archives up. I hope you’ll pray to whatever God you believe in, and heap endless scorn and abuse on the first goddamn hack that dares to try snooping around to find out what’s wrong. I [...] Related posts:

1. TOTBWI: (Totally off topic but worth it)
2. Speaking of Halloween
3. Goodbye, Texas Stadium

Apology

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Yesterday’s post with the two photos was in poor taste. Many readers wrote in to point this out. They’re right. I was wrong. I have taken it down. I apologize for causing offense. Related posts:An apology Funny — suddenly we’re having technical difficulties Dear Greenpeace: I’m still waiting for my apology Related posts:

1. An apology
2. Funny — suddenly we’re having technical difficulties
3. Dear Greenpeace: I’m still waiting for my apology

My talk with a left-wing hack

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So I had the opportunity, over the weekend, to speak to a hack from a top-tier news outlet. This guy leans left, as do almost all of the hackery, no matter what they might claim about being neutral or unbiased or not taking sides. And this guy was talking about Gabrielle Giffords and tut-tutting and [...] Related posts:

1. And the evil right-wing dipshit of the week award goes to …
2. Wikipedia’s premature publication
3. Gmail hack posted online- was it an inside job?

Signs of the apocalypse

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* Stock in private tech startups has risen 54% in the past six months. * A company that makes a wristband for using your iPod Nano as a wristwatch has raised nearly $1 million in venture funding. * A company that makes pants — that’s right, fucking pants — just raised $18.5 million. On top [...] Related posts:

1. Zuckerberg: Facebook now worth $50 billion. No, $60 billion. Oh wait–
2. They call it `venture chemo’
3. Yes, Virginia, there is a tech bubble

Hate-spewing “Christians” need to listen up

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You may have heard that a bunch of born-again idiots tried to sneak a gay-hating app into our App Store, and we pulled it, and now the wingnuts are protesting. See coverage on Catholic News Agency and Newser and ABC. Katie says I should just say nothing and let the whole thing fade away, which [...] Related posts:

1. This is why we hate public events
2. These goddamn Christians won’t give me a break
3. FWIW, Jesus didn’t always tell the truth, either

R.I.P., Leslie Nielsen

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No related posts. No related posts.

In case you are traveling this week

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I’m told that people who don’t have their own jets are being forced to subject to some humiliating patdowns. If you’re among those people, I will pray for your soul. Related posts:Oxymoron of the Week Comment of the week: Turns out I’m a total "moran" Goatberg Game: 15 uses of personal pronoun in this week’s [...] Related posts:

1. Oxymoron of the Week
2. Comment of the week: Turns out I’m a total "moran"
3. Goatberg Game: 15 uses of personal pronoun in this week’s column

I have no reason to run this photo

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But I saw it on Gawker and found it inspirational. Apparently she is some kind of singer. I’ve asked my iTunes people to come up with some pretext for a meeting. Related posts:Another reason not to put Linux on your iPod Another reason not to vote for McCain Angry Black Man: The real reason why [...] Related posts:

1. Another reason not to put Linux on your iPod
2. Another reason not to vote for McCain
3. Angry Black Man: The real reason why we finally put MMS in the iPhone

Woz backpedals, right on cue

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He claims to Engadget that he was misquoted. Just like we told him to say. He was like, How can I just go out today and say the exact opposite of what I just said yesterday? I told him, Easy, I do it all the time. Then Katie dialed the number for Engadget and held [...] Related posts:

1. Woz: Please start mincing words
2. Segway polo! Broadcast live! With Woz!
3. You thought I was kidding about "Great artists steal?"